Signs You Need Couples Therapy NOW…

It may not be too late to save your relationship BUT here are some signs that your relationship is in a dangerous place, so RUN not walk to a couples therapist NOW

1. Complete Emotional Disengagement

• One or both partners have emotionally withdrawn and no longer show interest in working on the relationship or communicating. They may feel indifferent, numb, or disconnected, with little or no emotional response to each other.

2. Persistent Resentment and Contempt

• If resentment or contempt has built up to the point where there is constant criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, or contemptuous communication (e.g., eye-rolling, name-calling), it may be hard to rebuild trust and respect.

3. No Desire to Improve or Commit

• If either partner feels they no longer want to put in the effort to make things better or have mentally or emotionally “checked out,” therapy may not be effective unless there is a change in that desire.

4. Repeated Patterns of Destructive Behavior

• If harmful patterns (like infidelity, addiction, lying or abuse) continue despite repeated attempts to address them, and there’s no willingness to change or seek help for these issues, it may indicate that therapy could be less effective.

5. One Partner is Already Considering Leaving

• If one partner is seriously considering leaving the relationship or has already started taking steps to end it (like moving out or speaking to a lawyer), it might indicate that they have already given up on the relationship.

6. Lack of Respect for the Therapy Process

• If one or both partners are not willing to engage sincerely in therapy, skip sessions, or undermine the process, it can be difficult to make progress.

7. Unresolved Trauma or Major Differences

• Some issues, like deep-seated trauma or fundamentally different life goals and values, may be too difficult to reconcile, even with therapy.

But, It’s Not Always Too Late

Even if these signs are present, it doesn’t necessarily mean therapy won’t help. Sometimes, the presence of these issues is actually a reason to seek therapy rather than avoid it. A skilled therapist can help identify whether there is still a foundation to work on and what steps might be taken.

What You Can Do:

• Talk to a Professional: An initial consultation with a couples therapist can help assess whether there is potential for progress.
• Reflect on Your Personal Goals: Consider what you want from the relationship and whether you’re willing to invest in the therapy process.
• Gauge Your Willingness to Change: Discuss with your partner whether both of you are open to working on the relationship and each of you making changes on your side.

Would you like more guidance on how to approach this situation? Email Janelle: [email protected]