What is Sexual Consent
Sexual consent is the mutual agreement between individuals to engage in certain sexual activities. Whether meeting up, dating or married this involves clear, informed, and voluntary communication (not coercion or shaming) where all parties involved understand and agree to the activities without the influence of drugs or alcohol and no surprises.
Key aspects of sexual consent include:
Voluntary: Consent must be given freely and without any form of pressure, coercion, manipulation, or threats. It should be an independent decision made by each person involved BEFORE any sexual activity begins.
Informed: All parties should have a clear understanding of what they are consenting to. This includes knowing the nature of the sexual activity, the people involved, and any potential risks or implications. There should be no surprises or unwanted sexual activities.
Clear and Ongoing: Consent should be explicitly communicated before any interaction through words or actions that indicate a clear willingness to engage in the activity. It should also be ongoing, meaning that consent can be withdrawn at any time, and all activity must stop immediately if consent is revoked. Sometimes having a “safe word” to state to your partner when you want things to stop could be using the word “Red”, which means to stop everything immediately. You owe it to yourself to have a safe word and to state this to your sexual partner. If they laugh or make fun of your safe word, you may want to leave the situation in order to keep yourself safe.
Capacity: The person giving consent must have the mental and physical ability to do so. This means they should not be under the influence of drugs or alcohol, unconscious, or otherwise unable to make informed decisions.
Age of Consent: Legal consent is tied to the age of the individuals involved, which varies by state. Individuals below the age of consent are not legally able to give valid consent to sexual activities and it may be considered sexual abuse or rape.
Sexual consent is essential for any healthy and respectful sexual relationship, ensuring that all participants feel safe and respected. If your partner doesn’t respect your boundaries or wants to push things farther than you are comfortable with, it’s ok to stop all sexual interactions immediately and leave the situation. Your safety is paramount!!
If someone is not respecting your boundaries sexually or otherwise in your relationship please reach out to me. This is a tough situation to navigate on your own and I’m here for you.
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